Stories of Transformation - Becky

Summary

Becky arrived at her first week-long retreat excited until learning about a surrender activity (trust fall), which triggered sheer terror - not just fear but abject terror from similar past trauma experiences she had completely blocked out. She cried for 2 hours Monday night but didn't want it to ruin her retreat, so she picked apart the fear and realized her greatest fear was going through the stress as the old person and getting more trauma stuck in her lower centers. She decided to become a new person, saying "I have 3 days to become a new person" - someone who would embrace and love trust falls. She rehearsed by watching others do the activity, practicing falling back on her bed, creating a script of power words ("I am Becky, I am unlimited, I am miracles, I am fearless, I am ready to surrender"), sizing up her group, and talking about being a new person rather than reinforcing old fears. On Thursday when her legs started shaking uncontrollably on the platform, she recognized it as just an old program, made her voice louder than the fear, screamed her power words at the top of her lungs, and surrendered - the scream releasing all lower center energy through her throat, transforming her completely and proving the world is a safe place.