Stories of Transformation - Jen

Summary

Horse trainer working with 1200 pound challenging horses, body breaking down with arm tendonitis, back and knee pain from physical demanding job, couldn't stand long. COVID hit, assistant left, extroverted person spiraled into darkness and isolation feeling alone, difficult childhood with tough father, two older brothers, family of shoulds and hard work. Hadn't talked to father eight years since brother's drug overdose, 2014 almost died from relapse into cutting, binge drinking, night terrors and panic attacks, refused drugs wanting to keep edge. Walking meditation around lake end of day, tired wanted to cheat going back to hotel, chose right turn staying committed asking where future going. Stopped with arms out, four-year-old self with blonde pigtails took hand asking am I gonna be okay, said yes you'll be fine, little girl said don't call me Jenny call me Poosie like daddy does. Reconnected with father after eight years, loved each version of self through years, future self appeared saying struggle over you're okay too, felt eternal self-love first time in 46 years. Stood up feeling odd, no pain in right arm tendonitis or knee from decade working horses, phantom sensation above arm not in physical body anymore, synchronicities including investor $144,000 then subject 44 coherence healing.